This is How I Break
by Beckon
Summary: It was too early to talk but still, she felt the need to wake him and tell him that.


**A/N: I have an odd attraction to this couple and not entirely sure if it can be explained and/or described. This was a simple sample I started a few months back and got around to finishing it, it's a bit out of character and maybe rushed but I kind of like it. Also, as a bit of a forewarning, I really don't care for people telling me how Soifon wouldn't leave Yourichi, because I don't really care for that couple itself- no offense.**

"What are you doing here?"

"I couldn't sleep… I had to talk to someone."

"… Okay, just let me get my jacket."

"Why are you still up?"

"I wasn't."

She waited patiently for the man to return; listening to the sounds of him moving around in his room before he eventually re-emerged. The black Shinigami uniform seemed to blend together with his dark skin and the line of separation was almost impossible to see in the faint light around them. He pulled his white Captain's jacket over the uniform and allowed for his bedroom door to slide closed behind him. There were no words as they both simply started on down along the winding corridor in front of them.

She kept up with his steady gait and took note of how he seemingly forgot to pull his dark dreadlocks back; instead, they dressed down his shoulders and seemed to bounce lightly with every step. Despite the sudden interruption in his sleeping schedule, he still managed to slip on the ever present white visors he always wore- she thought they looked a bit ridiculous but that was just her own opinion.

It didn't take long before the confining Division walls opened up into the somewhat welcoming atmosphere outside. The early morning sky was still dark and the sun was still far from reaching the horizon line; even the hint of sunlight was denied in the pitch dark clouds above them. It would take her a few more minutes for her eyes to adjust to the lack of light- she did her best not to stumble over something childish in the meantime. The cool morning breeze was chilly but manageable as she simply pulled her Captain's jacket up a bit tighter around her neck. She felt the path beneath them change to the stone-paved walkway that curved out into the wide-open fields that decorated the side of his Division house.

"You know… for a woman who wanted to talk, you're saying very few words."

She wrinkled her nose slightly at his sudden remark and proceeded to place her hands into the pockets of her jacket. "I guess it was all in my head." She watched as he carefully followed another curve in the walkway that lead up into the large, overwhelming fields; she was almost certain there were parts of it where the grass was taller than she was. "You know, for a blind man, you seem to know where you're going."

"I've traveled this path many times before." he started. "After awhile, you learn it- much like how you learn to read someone's energy and know when something is bothering them."

"Don't concern yourself with feeble matters." she snorted lightly as she turned her attention to the changing environment around them. "It's a mere inconsistency. It will pass."

"You say that now."

"And I'll say it again if you ask me."

She watched as he only shook his head lightly but didn't add anything else; instead, he continued on the makeshift path that now seemed to turn to dirt underneath them as it curved deeper into the field.

Why was she even here? Why the hell did she even come out this far? It was just… it was over something feeble and juvenile anyways… something unlike her; something she should've been able to look over by now. But no, instead of getting over it, she was out here wasting her time and her beauty sleep.

"Something is bothering you."

Damnit, she thought he was going to drop that act. A sharp scoff left her lips at his words as she rolled her eyes. "I stick to my previous statement."

"Whatever suits you best." he replied as though now catching on to her annoyance in the matter.

Shaking her head, she stuck with just following him up the slight hill that raised itself beneath the field; the clean air and movement would do her some good in clearing her mind. At this point, she wasn't entirely sure why she drug him out all this way- it wasn't like she had a problem with wasting the morning away by herself… but some part of her just wanted to drag him out all this way; well at least she wasn't wasting all this time by herself. At least she was ruining someone else's morning with her own. Closing her eyes for a moment, she just listened to the faint sounds around her; the entire field seemed to be struck by silence but every now and then there was the chirp of some kind of insect off in the distance; every now and then, a morning bird would flap its wings overhead as it scooted itself across the treetops. She guessed it was just one of those silent, somewhat peaceful type days… not that she really cared for them anyways.

She stopped at the sound of him pausing in his steps and opened her eyes to view the small clearing in the field before them; the top of the hill was clean of any overgrown foliage and instead stayed with a rather flat layer of dirt instead. "What is this place?"

"Not entirely sure, but I like to come up here to take in the silence and think for a bit." Tousen answered with a light stretch. "Mostly when something's troubling me."

She caught on to his quick addition to his previous statement and wrinkled her nose once more. "For the last time-"

"I didn't say it was for you." he interrupted lightly as he started to walk ahead of her.

"Oh, is that so?" she questioned- not that she really cared for the matter. "And what exactly is bothering you?"

"Just everyday little things." he shrugged back to her. "But mostly just having to listen to you."

"Tsk." she clicked sharply as she placed her hands on her hips. "I suppose I can let you have that one, but that's it."

He chuckled lightly at her words as he slowly walked around the perimeter of the clearing. "Feel free to stay or leave if you wish."

She only shook her head in return before she slowly started to walk after him. "Do you ever get the feeling that… whenever you think you have something right, it suddenly turns out that it was just wrong the entire time?"

"Occasionally."

"Yeah well… it sucks." she scoffed as she stiffly crossed her arms over her chest; she wasn't good at this whole 'talking it out' kind of business; it just seemed like an easy way to reveal a weakness. "And I'm tired of heaving to deal with that kind of shit."

"You'll figure out what you want one day." he replied.

"That one day is going to be today; I'll tell you here and now… I don't want her anymore." she started; irked by how weak she sounded with the words. She was practically cringing at her own confession. "She's just… a waste of my time."

He paused slightly and half-turned back to where she was; the expression on his face was set in a way where he didn't seem to know exactly how to take her words. "Are you sure you want to say that?"

She made yet another irritated face at his question as she easily closed the space between them now. "Of course I am; in fact, I'm as certain of that decision as I am on the fact that those visors of yours look ridiculous." she lightly snapped as she stopped herself in front of him.

"Then maybe you should be glad you're not the one wearing them." he replied just as quickly. "Not that I care much for your opinion on them anyways."

A frown curved her lips at his response before she easily grabbed the visors and pulled them free. He didn't attempt to stop her, of if he had tried to, he wasn't quick enough for it. She examined the white frames up close before she carefully slipped them on herself. "Tsk. They're absolutely useless."

"You're right… They do look ridiculous on you."

"What would you know? You're just a blind man." she reminded as she tossed the visors into his chest; watching as he swiftly caught them.

"And you're just a woman with a lot of secrets."

She clicked her tongue in more agitation. "Well, I won't deny that but I won't go into further details about it either."

"I didn't ask you to."

Drawing a deep breath, she ran a hand through her black hair and held the air in her chest before she slowly released it; hoping that in some way the method would calm her some. This whole thing was just a mistake. "I guess… I could go back and try to salvage what little sleep I can still get at this time."

"You seem like you need it." he commented as though their previous argument had disappeared into thin air.

"Pft, give me one night of good sleep and I can forget anything and everything about her." she scoffed lightly.

"Well at least you don't keep yourself stuck on the past." he spoke with a small chuckle. "The sun will be up in a few hours, you might want to get a head start on that sleep if you still want it."

Even if he was blind, she wouldn't let him see the barely visible smile that tugged at her lips. "Yeah, I guess I could." she replied stiffly; watching as he only seemed to shake his head at her. "What are you going to do?"

"I'll probably just keep walking around for a bit." he answered. "I've been up for too long to even imagine going back to sleep and it's too early to be training right now."

"Suit yourself." she shrugged as she turned to go.

He started to walk with her back towards the only path that lead out of the field and back into reality; it felt like that everything that had to be said was and that the rather scarce situation had solved itself. She waited till they had only made it a few feet before she turned back to him. It seemed like everything happened in the blink of an eye as she grabbed a fistful of his white jacket and used her sheer strength to drop him easily. Oddly enough, the motion worked out better than expected as she found herself able to pin him down with her own body.

"I'm caught between wondering if I want to know or asking myself 'Soifon, what the _hell_ are you doing?'" he started as the sudden collision with the ground certainly woke him up for sure this time; not to mention, it brought a slight pain to his back.

"You didn't once think that I would be able to pull off something like this?" she questioned.

"I guess I just didn't see all four-feet and eleven-inches of you suddenly deciding to throw me to the ground." he answered as he started to push himself up onto the support of his arms; feeling her shift her own balance as she sat back slightly against his abdomen. "Now then, is there a reason for all of this or is this just how you say thank you?"

She watched carefully how even though his eyes were solid white, they still somehow managed to convey emotions- such as now, he was clearly aggravated by her behavior. She brought her hands up to his jawline and pulled him forward about the same time she leaned in; there was certainly a shock value in the motion as his hands came up to reject it while she stiffly denied him that.

"Soifon… what are you doing?" he managed to piece together before her tongue caved in on his own. There was no denying the mix of heat and euphoria that erupted at that simple-complex gesture. His earlier attempts weakened slightly as his hands now seemed to rest on her ribcage rather than near bruising them like before. Her fingertips felt as though they were piercing into his jawline as she made easy work of the embrace between them.

"You can't deny it…" she whispered as her lips were just barely able to draw away from his own. Her dark eyes sought out an answer in his disabled ones as she tried to keep a steady thought process while she spoke. "That connection…"

He couldn't be certain what she was talking about but the way her lips moved to seek out his own… he figured she at least knew what she was talking about for herself; she knew what she wanted out of this. As much as he wanted to pull away from her, it felt like something concrete was holding them together. "Are you sure you want this?"

"Damn sure." she replied; lifting herself up on her knees to gain a better angle above him. "It's just a kiss…"

Soon enough, that kiss had their hands refusing to remain stationary.

Her fingers tugged at his dreadlocks and her nails seemed to tear at the back of his neck; he pulled away at her jacket and managed to pull her uniform down to expose her slender shoulders. She responded easily and practically ripped open the front of his uniform to remove it and his jacket in one quick motion; leaving the contrasting material to pool around the bend of his arm as he stripped off her outer uniform to reveal the secondary one underneath it. The chilliness of the morning air seemed to be lost on contact as their rushing heartbeats fueled the blood flow through their bodies and flushed their skin to a darker shade of red.

The morning sun found them giving in to the deadly desires that could both cure and curse all in one; their bodies unforgiving to each other as not a single word or expression was held back between them. If they had this one moment, then everything else was void; everything else that did not pertain to the hard-driven lust that engulfed them was forgotten so easily.

"_This is how I break…"_

"_Let me help pick up those broken pieces." _


End file.
